i can't believe you IM'd me out of all people, ME. i always knew you would come back to talk to us or i guess me. i always had hope that i would end up talking to you once more. its good to hear from old friends again, or maybe for one last time..

i wish i could send this to you because this is so true :'(
“No, it’s not that. It’s not what you’re thinking. I was serious when I said ‘all of it’. I can remember every moment we were together, and in each of them there was something wonderful. I can’t really pick any one time that meant more than any other. The entire summer was perfect, the kind of summer everyone should have. How could I pick one moment over another? Poets often describe love as an emotion that we can’t control, one that overwhelms logic and common sense. That’s what it was like for me. I didn’t plan on falling in love with you, and I doubt if you planned on falling in love with me. But once we met, it was clear that neither of us could control what was happening to us. We fell in love, despite our differences, and once we did, something rare and beautiful was created. For me, love like that has happened only once, and that’s why every minute we spent together has been seared in my memory. I’ll never forget a single moment of it.”
—The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks

so many things going on, i don't know how im going to handle all of it. Im going to try to help my family out though a lot with this job. I hope this morning goes good. I've never tried this but i hope im doing the right thing for once.

im having one of those moments when you can't get that one special person off your mind. Your just thinking of all the happy moments you've shared with her. When your feeling neutral and you miss them incredibly. All Happy memories and thoughts. and i just know, most definitely know, that i will be happy to spend the rest of my life with you. that i want to, more than anything, that's all i want.

idk what to do. i say this 1000 times a day, everyday. i felt horrible last night/ this morning. been awake since 6 am. i think the worst thing that i heard you tell me, was that i couldn't make you happy. That destroyed me. Bc that made me think ill never have a chance with you in a million years. i think what gave me the horrible feeling yesterday, was the horrible things i said about her. I wish you told me i was the only one for you, but obv im not. i mean, thinking about it a lot. what chance do i have against those SVA guys. They're there and i am here. I have to face the fact that a lot of artsy people are hot. i should just shut the fuck up now. Deprived of happyness...

i really miss you. this might sound so dumb, but im watching THS on snookie, and something about this is just making me miss you so much, making me wish i was still your boyfriend. im feeling normal though, its a different feeling then usual. i hope this 3 weeks fly, i really want to spend time with you.